As parents, and educators, how do we assess the intelligence of our kids? Do we associate it with ‘the ability to learn, understand and think in a logical way about things, a traditional takeaway meaning from dictionaries? If so, it is high time we shopped around and broadened our understanding of the term intelligence, particularly, in the intersections of the burgeoning theories of emotional intelligence.
In the popular understanding of intelligence, the ultimate axiom is still anchored around a set of mental abilities, such as, cognition (understanding and storing information), logical thinking (reason and logic), problem solving etc. Caught in the whirlwind of this kind of thinking, we journey blindfolded along the directions indicated by the British psychologist Charles Spearman who introduced the theory of general intelligence, popularly called the ‘g factor’ and the German Psychologist William Stern who coined the term ‘IQ’ (intelligence quotient). In any of these, mental abilities rule the roost in defining what intelligence is.
It is no secret that the kind of the IQ-based thinking has misguided us, leading us to wrongly categorize a vast number of individuals in the society, that includes our kids, family and friends, as unintelligent and therefore incompetent to acquire higher education, and incapable of assuming leadership roles. In this regard, I have a tangible case, a moving testimony of a dear friend, to present (permission obtained): my friend was considered to be an unintelligent, a ‘potential drop-out student’ by her teachers during her lower primary school years. Her only saving grace was that she had a mother who was aware of her quiet but persevering personal abilities for success in areas of her play and friendship with other kids. Being convinced of her indefatigable spirit, her mother stopped sending her to school, and alternatively provided her with homeschooling. Saved by the ingenious action of her mother, she grew up to become an artist and an educator. She has established herself so reputably, that many artistically-oriented individuals compete to join her on the regular art and culture expeditions she undertakes to distant countries and continents of the world. Currently, she is working as a professor in a renowned International University, teaching art. She certainly knows and earnestly believes, in her interactions with students, that intelligence exceeds the parameters of the IQ tests, just like Daniel Goleman, who gave a jump-start to the proliferation of the concept of emotional intelligence.
Fortunately, we today don’t have to repeat the same mistake of assessing intelligence by the theoretical standardization of the general intelligence (g factor) and the IQ. There is more to a person’s intelligence than his/her mere mental abilities. This is the good news which the invention of emotional intelligence promises to us.
Emotional Intelligence, a household phrase
By the end of the twentieth century, Peter Salovey and John D. Meyer, two American psychologists introduced the theory of emotional intelligence. In their original explanation of the theory, they defined emotional intelligence as the ability to identify, understand, use and regulate emotions.
The concept was widely popularized by Daniel Goleman, a psychologist and the former science journalist of The New York Times, through his internationally bestselling book, “Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ.”
Goleman explained emotional intelligence as our ability to handle ourselves in relationships particularly, on four different domains such as self awareness (knowing our feelings -what we are feeling and why we are feeling), self management (handling our emotions, especially the distressing ones that could cripple us from functioning, and being ourselves), empathy (knowing the feelings of others) and finally the social skill of putting all of these together in promoting prosocial behaviours.
Mastering these skills is not easy for many as we tend to mask our emotions. But with effort and repeated practice one could master these skills. A lot of our difficulties, both interpersonal and intrapersonal, could be avoided, handled well and learned to live with if not fully resolved, when we are able to master the skills of emotional intelligence. Besides the emotional regulation of the self and others, emotional intelligence enhances our ability to think well because emotions precede thoughts. With better management and regulation of emotions, we learn to equip ourselves with clarity of thoughts and decision-making skills.
Since Goleman’s publication of the book that made emotional intelligence a ‘household phrase’ as expressed by Camille Chatterjee, author, there have been numerous studies linking it with positive indicators of better self-awareness, better interpersonal relationships, better teamwork, better job performance and satisfaction, retention at work, and easy disposition to accepting changes. Studies also suggest that couples with high emotional intelligence are able to enjoy better marital satisfaction.
One of Goleman’s ground-breaking theoretical premises favouring emotional intelligence over IQ is that it isn’t genetic, but could be learned at any phase of one’s life. IQ on the other hand, is genetic and therefore there is a static quality to it. Contrary to one’s privilege of being born with high IQ, which is not the case with the majority of human beings, emotional intelligence is a learned skill that improves the quality of our personal, interpersonal, social and professional living.
If we understand this broader dimension of emotional intelligence as proposed by Goleman, we will perhaps stop going after our kids (ourselves and others, too) with a narrow yardstick built on the merits of mental abilities for measuring intelligence. We will certainly appreciate everyone’s potential to be intelligent.
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